Nature's mystries

The cloudy shadow

the crystal clear reflections...

the water which can spell bound

a traveler's paradise

dream of a lifetime

those rocks unmoved

those steps unshaken

will have to be surpassed soon....

The motivation a picture can  entice

the dreams a scene can en-kindle

can only be experienced n not captured ... 

but someday ... someday they will all be mine....

With me...

That hazy face behind the smoke...

those hazy eyes behind the smiles...

the dancing of sun behind the clouds

the wetness in the rain soaked arms

somewhere everything can be explained

somehow all fits in place

the walk of life has path laid

every look is destined

every touch is pre-planned

all the leaves falling my way are ment for me

all roses kept in front of me are mine to cherish...

the memories with me are still supporting me...

even those hazy eyes behind the smoke are with me always...

Closest to home yet farthest from life...

Closest to home yet farthest from life...

sooner or later it will be over but

still few things will live on...

can't fight tears that are coming

and living just coz want to be alive...

just want to know who i am

someday soon it will all be dusted

n no will ever know the thoughts...

somewhere i wanna live yet

few things want me to be far off...

all seems like the dreams

which will end... but

somehow broken glass will be showing my story....

just... the chaos need to end so that

i can carry on...

getting the hang of tonight... can't stop the thoughts

flowing in one way street... without belief but still hanging on...

still carrying on....

silence the effect of love or hate...

silence the golden effect of love

silence the sparkling effect of hate

where is this coming from my side today

is it coz i am avoiding or...

am i going for head on collision

silence the golden effect of love

silence the sparkling effect of hate

today is that day when sky seems to be dull

n the rain is still nowhere to be seen

still i am confused...

silence the golden effect of love

silence the sparkling effect of hate

all alone n not needing anyone

all lost n don't know how

but somehow the mind clear...

n the silence is no more in eyes but in my mind...

making me calm n myself again....

silence the golden effect of love....

silence the sparkling effect of hate....

Scent of presence

the lasting of fragrance...

that feeling of touch

the flying of kites in windy skies

the blooming of flowers

awestruck audience...

everybody looking for time alone

and yet no one has a open heart

no one is ready to open eyes...

to view the vibrant sky

cause the smile on someone's face

let the smile hanging in your mind

elevated with simple smiles

exhilarated with just the touch of a yellow rose...

finding the brightness on a sunny day

Eagle's Flight

The way he moves,

so sure with pleasure...

so swift with assurance...

Nothing escapes his eyes

no fragrant pray leaves his senses

The way he escapes

so majestic with smiles....

so experienced with ease...

Nothing escapes his eyes

no fragrant pray leaves his senses

Like the smoke rises

he rises from the fall

glides across my mind

playing with my sensibility....

There is nothing he can't achieve

there is nothing stopping him...

crushing that arrogance

i am ready to take the flight for untouchables....

raindrops..

raindrops....

so soft n fragile....

so inspirational and impacting...

when they touch my hands...

eyes seem to melt

green becomes lush

blue turns vibrant...

n my feeling go haywire...

Individuality...

why oh why

unique... individual...

different... brave...

you... me...

should we be spinning on our heels...

cant we be just what we are???

is it actually that difficult to let us be???

Sometimes...

Sometimes... its so easy...

somewhere... that smile awaits me

traffic is slow... yet wind is teasing me...

that muscular movement n the lingering laugh

that times when eternity seems actually eternal

don't know when to stop yet stopping

can't imagine the start yet end is certain

when life is standing still and still my breath is betraying me...

that time called wait....

that moving past the craziness... still being sane...

those times when tears and laughter can't stop at the same time....

sometime the times just carry on without me...

there are some examples i can't play

there are honors i can't repay...

awestruck... with my cowardice n my brave heart beating against me...

sometimes life betrays yet the happiness carry on....

pain vs reality

pain so high...

brain seems to be guiding the body

"take a knife n end it all"

body seems so much in pain to disagree (thank god...)

the smiles have faded away...

joy seems to have never existed

only think that can be felt

is the tussle between the mind n the body

pain so high... still body wins over mind

mind loves me too much so can't let me bear the pain...

body loves me too much so can't let me end the pain....

who should i be thanking.... who should i ...

my nomadic dreams

when dreams run to catch u

thats the time u realize the smile

that smile which can explain ur dream

that look in the mirror which can say the unsaid words

the nomad in me wants to move

the stagnant me wants to keep me stationed

the tug off war is on constantly

the struggle for movement... oh yes the struggle

this seems like the time when i wanna live

this is the time i wanna vanish

but what so ever the mind says

my heart still will be wandering about the river side...

that sand in my slippery mind

that water which can be held in my arms

the feeling of setting sun in my hair

the option to capture the eternity is always mine....

Somethings never change

trying to figure out if this is good or bad

caught between friends n foes in my mind

not sure if i wanna be out of this dilemma or am i enjoying this once again

so many things that need my attention yet

these thoughts make me wonder n digress

so many things that can change, are in need of change, must be changed

yet it seems to be an eternity since they have changed

not sure if somethings that never change - need to be changed or chained as they r

where r these thought leading me to...

i am guiding them or r they leading me to no mans land

so much confusion that i am not thinking of rapidly changing me

so much stagnation that i am still not thinking of rapidly changing me

so much... so much ... so much yet so little is in my mind...

it is affected by things which hold no meaning in my heart

it is reacting to actions unintentional and not for me

where is the love n warmth i felt within me for life

where is all this mess found way into my life

it was simple n i made it so....

but did i do it knowingly or just that i wanted to change and face the world the way it is

am i being guided by the waves of worldliness

am i ready to be tamed....???

NO... i will not let this be... i will make my way through to the end...

n i will smile coz i WANT to smile

i will make my feelings felt by my heart....

I WILL... I WILL... I WILL not let somethings change yet will make some changes....

Contradictions in life…

How many times have I cought myself saying “wait for a minute, I’ll be back in 5 mins” amazing na? don’t know whether its true that time flies by and that’s why there is always shortage of time. Don’t know if I waste time or time wastes me. Don’t know a lot of thinks yet there is no need for me to go on and on about time when actually right now also I am with time and just planning ahead of time. One life time can be summed up in a life’s moment so why live the complete life. May be I have the answer to that also – life’s moments ……

This is in complete and I am sure I can not complete it as time is not permitting me to… anyone of you wants to carry this forwards please do…..

No clue what I did or why I did…

It was amazing but not sure what I did n why I did,

Smell of cigs, and the vodka chocolates was playing with my senses,

The touch of an angel spirit was caressing my body,

The kiss was like that atomic explosion…

And yet I could not control or was I in control???

The tease started the day, and the tease ended the night,

The smile did it all and the rest was all my fault,

The senses are still not intact; the smile is still on my shoulder,

Could I have stopped it, or did I even want to stop it???

So much to say n yet we chose just to not say…

The task was impossible n yet was pulled with utmost care,

I would say that the complete time was full of play,

Again I would say, should I have done it or should I just let this stay???

The misconception about height and the falling short of words,

These were some of the reality checks at the moment,

The raining hugs n the snowing of kisses was disconcerting,

Something started as empty talks actually took hold of me,

Trying to figure out it’s a thought, a dream or a reality???

Now I understand how it started….

Who would back out was the start and no one did was the end…

I am sure I liked it… not sure if someone liked it too???

Confusions....

"To be or not to be" was a thought.... but my mind has more things associated with it, to do or not to do, to think or let it be, to make hay while it shines or just give in, to even dream or just be awake and walk though life. No clue where are my thoughts leading me to or am i the one leading them into this confusion.

At times that smile on my little ones face makes me thing that every thing is OK and we will service just fine, but the next day the questions in his mind make me re-think. At times the way he will hold me to sleep is what makes me thank god for his love, but then makes me cry to that why have i denied him that exposure to the world.

after all the turmoil when i got up today, i was happy and found that everything in life has a flip side and so does my mood.... :D