Eagle's Flight

The way he moves,

so sure with pleasure...

so swift with assurance...

Nothing escapes his eyes

no fragrant pray leaves his senses

The way he escapes

so majestic with smiles....

so experienced with ease...

Nothing escapes his eyes

no fragrant pray leaves his senses

Like the smoke rises

he rises from the fall

glides across my mind

playing with my sensibility....

There is nothing he can't achieve

there is nothing stopping him...

crushing that arrogance

i am ready to take the flight for untouchables....

raindrops..

raindrops....

so soft n fragile....

so inspirational and impacting...

when they touch my hands...

eyes seem to melt

green becomes lush

blue turns vibrant...

n my feeling go haywire...

Individuality...

why oh why

unique... individual...

different... brave...

you... me...

should we be spinning on our heels...

cant we be just what we are???

is it actually that difficult to let us be???

Sometimes...

Sometimes... its so easy...

somewhere... that smile awaits me

traffic is slow... yet wind is teasing me...

that muscular movement n the lingering laugh

that times when eternity seems actually eternal

don't know when to stop yet stopping

can't imagine the start yet end is certain

when life is standing still and still my breath is betraying me...

that time called wait....

that moving past the craziness... still being sane...

those times when tears and laughter can't stop at the same time....

sometime the times just carry on without me...

there are some examples i can't play

there are honors i can't repay...

awestruck... with my cowardice n my brave heart beating against me...

sometimes life betrays yet the happiness carry on....

pain vs reality

pain so high...

brain seems to be guiding the body

"take a knife n end it all"

body seems so much in pain to disagree (thank god...)

the smiles have faded away...

joy seems to have never existed

only think that can be felt

is the tussle between the mind n the body

pain so high... still body wins over mind

mind loves me too much so can't let me bear the pain...

body loves me too much so can't let me end the pain....

who should i be thanking.... who should i ...

my nomadic dreams

when dreams run to catch u

thats the time u realize the smile

that smile which can explain ur dream

that look in the mirror which can say the unsaid words

the nomad in me wants to move

the stagnant me wants to keep me stationed

the tug off war is on constantly

the struggle for movement... oh yes the struggle

this seems like the time when i wanna live

this is the time i wanna vanish

but what so ever the mind says

my heart still will be wandering about the river side...

that sand in my slippery mind

that water which can be held in my arms

the feeling of setting sun in my hair

the option to capture the eternity is always mine....

Somethings never change

trying to figure out if this is good or bad

caught between friends n foes in my mind

not sure if i wanna be out of this dilemma or am i enjoying this once again

so many things that need my attention yet

these thoughts make me wonder n digress

so many things that can change, are in need of change, must be changed

yet it seems to be an eternity since they have changed

not sure if somethings that never change - need to be changed or chained as they r

where r these thought leading me to...

i am guiding them or r they leading me to no mans land

so much confusion that i am not thinking of rapidly changing me

so much stagnation that i am still not thinking of rapidly changing me

so much... so much ... so much yet so little is in my mind...

it is affected by things which hold no meaning in my heart

it is reacting to actions unintentional and not for me

where is the love n warmth i felt within me for life

where is all this mess found way into my life

it was simple n i made it so....

but did i do it knowingly or just that i wanted to change and face the world the way it is

am i being guided by the waves of worldliness

am i ready to be tamed....???

NO... i will not let this be... i will make my way through to the end...

n i will smile coz i WANT to smile

i will make my feelings felt by my heart....

I WILL... I WILL... I WILL not let somethings change yet will make some changes....

Contradictions in life…

How many times have I cought myself saying “wait for a minute, I’ll be back in 5 mins” amazing na? don’t know whether its true that time flies by and that’s why there is always shortage of time. Don’t know if I waste time or time wastes me. Don’t know a lot of thinks yet there is no need for me to go on and on about time when actually right now also I am with time and just planning ahead of time. One life time can be summed up in a life’s moment so why live the complete life. May be I have the answer to that also – life’s moments ……

This is in complete and I am sure I can not complete it as time is not permitting me to… anyone of you wants to carry this forwards please do…..

No clue what I did or why I did…

It was amazing but not sure what I did n why I did,

Smell of cigs, and the vodka chocolates was playing with my senses,

The touch of an angel spirit was caressing my body,

The kiss was like that atomic explosion…

And yet I could not control or was I in control???

The tease started the day, and the tease ended the night,

The smile did it all and the rest was all my fault,

The senses are still not intact; the smile is still on my shoulder,

Could I have stopped it, or did I even want to stop it???

So much to say n yet we chose just to not say…

The task was impossible n yet was pulled with utmost care,

I would say that the complete time was full of play,

Again I would say, should I have done it or should I just let this stay???

The misconception about height and the falling short of words,

These were some of the reality checks at the moment,

The raining hugs n the snowing of kisses was disconcerting,

Something started as empty talks actually took hold of me,

Trying to figure out it’s a thought, a dream or a reality???

Now I understand how it started….

Who would back out was the start and no one did was the end…

I am sure I liked it… not sure if someone liked it too???

Confusions....

"To be or not to be" was a thought.... but my mind has more things associated with it, to do or not to do, to think or let it be, to make hay while it shines or just give in, to even dream or just be awake and walk though life. No clue where are my thoughts leading me to or am i the one leading them into this confusion.

At times that smile on my little ones face makes me thing that every thing is OK and we will service just fine, but the next day the questions in his mind make me re-think. At times the way he will hold me to sleep is what makes me thank god for his love, but then makes me cry to that why have i denied him that exposure to the world.

after all the turmoil when i got up today, i was happy and found that everything in life has a flip side and so does my mood.... :D

the other day....

...the other day i was asked to pen down my thoughts and some how they got lost... today i am sitting back and trying to recall that smile and those eyes looking directly in the 'zero' domain...

it was amazing how the moon shone on the car glass and made those eyes lost in pink floyd music look even more enticing than the eyes which look at u yet are not there.... as if they can see past everything....

it was amazing I had just given that look only a passing thought till the time the Leather Jacket did not surface back up in front of my eyes... they made me go back in memory and made me realize that some where some how things are not lost for me and i still do look out for the moments when everything is a bliss and like a fairy tale...

met those eyes again the other day and realized they r the same every time coz they may be looking out for something more to see in some other rainbow horizon....

I know this may be sounding too dreamy but then its my thought after all....

Uncertainty in life's decisions....

Sometimes I wonder where is the life coming from ad where is it exactly leading to…. There are so many things I do not understand and they can not be explained also so why do these things come up and why do we spend time thinking about them… where are the energies saving us from the evil (if it exists), why are they not there showing the path which has to be enlightened. So if they are not there should I look for my path on my own….. wow this is the correct method.
So now that its decided that I need to decide my own path and trot on it as well… let me chart the way… but its all so unclear…. What do I want is non tangible so what can I put against it to be realized in real… peace and harmony with myself… is it a right thing t ask for in life…. Where can I get the life which is suitable for me???

Wait a minute… now my mind is blocked and I am back to this world…..

the shattering effect.....

yesterday i smiled and then today of course I cried...

that how it has been always and this is how it will be n my life always...

no clue how i survive this world and no idea how its gonna help in life either....

but i know one thing for sure...i can live the dream i spun for my self... not so long ago...

some day it will be that day when i will not regret the decisions lived by me....

some day it will be that day when i will smile without thinking about the sorrows behind...

just wondering when will that day come in my life....

no one can answer that for me... coz no one will ever know that what i is in store for me....

Lack of words….

There is a flood of emotions creeping up my throat,
followed by the drought of expressing words…
time has finally come when I should be speaking up,

but some how I find myself stuck in the twist of feelings and not speaking up after all.....

Trotting on my way to…eternity…

The dream has been spun…and formatting begun,
The path has been laid and waiting to be begun,
Everything materialized still nothing yet has begun…

Mo matter how much it takes… this is a path I wanna take,
I wanna walk that extra mile and reach out to that forbidden fruit,
I wanna break this unseen shackle holing me back…
...hoping this time i actually do...